Psyching Out
What happened and what went through my head..
Tuesday, April 10, 2012
Monday, December 19, 2011
Self-centered Freak
OMG!! I'm bored out of my mind!
I'm not lucky today...
It's raining and there's no cab to get me home...
I've been stuck in the same place for 9 hours now and I just can't wait for tomorrow!
It sucked today.
This day is pretty much over...
Just bits of insignificant events that are definitely not for the books...
What else can make this day any duller I wonder?
Sigh. Usually I'm okay with being alone...
But today, for some reason, I'm feeling extra lonely ;(
It's like I've joined a moping club
Wandering aimlessly around campus like a freak.
Why can't I find someone to bother?
Damn it!
I'm starting to listen to Breaking Benjamin again
Take me out of my misery!
I'm not lucky today...
It's raining and there's no cab to get me home...
I've been stuck in the same place for 9 hours now and I just can't wait for tomorrow!
It sucked today.
This day is pretty much over...
Just bits of insignificant events that are definitely not for the books...
What else can make this day any duller I wonder?
Sigh. Usually I'm okay with being alone...
But today, for some reason, I'm feeling extra lonely ;(
It's like I've joined a moping club
Wandering aimlessly around campus like a freak.
Why can't I find someone to bother?
Damn it!
I'm starting to listen to Breaking Benjamin again
Take me out of my misery!
Wednesday, December 7, 2011
That’s It?
I’ve just done my Ethnic class’ presentation.
It's nice to be congratulated by some of my friends. Besides, I thought I did pretty well. I prepared a lot and actually psyched myself out a little.
The lecturer said that a few things were missing (“politik masa sekarang” to be exact).
On other presentations, she gave certain pointers on where it was good or not but not on mine.
“Itu je?” she said when I finished. Nothing on the slides, or on the presentation... “Mana politik masa sekarang?” Then I said some stuff I can’t recall; something about politicians and issues. Then, she addressed the class and thanked our group and the next group came out for their turn.
In my head, I was freaking out! The topic was SEJARAH politik Malaysia, and on other presentations never did she ask on things related to current themes. Sigh. Honestly, I admit that I probably should have thought about that.
It’s a mixed feeling getting that feedback from her.
The problem is I can’t stop replaying the presentation in my head. Was I too fast? My friend said it was in a normal speed, about 20 minutes or so. Or maybe I was rude to her in a way...
*cringe*
I talked for 20 minutes and I got “itu je?” Maybe I should’ve slowed down and talk for an hour. Oh well, it can’t be helped now.
This was another unexpected event. There has been quite a few in this week, and nothing is happening like I expect it would. A few days left, I’m sure things would be fine. Then again, maybe I shouldn’t expect anything.
Can’t Stop
It’s bitter sweet looking at you
I don’t know why but it’s like I’m paper with you
I’m a balled-crunched up piece
Just a touch sends me in two ways
I’m a stepped-on paper, so crushed
All I can do is hold everything in
You come around and my stomach twist
You make me so sick; I’m addicted to it
When everything comes down I’m a flattened sheet
It’s a relieve but I miss the feeling
I’m still with creases
Just waiting to be balled up again
I know it’s all in my head
But what can I do?
I know nothing’s ever going to happen
I keep telling myself to stop, but I just can’t.
Monday, January 3, 2011
New Year!! New stress... No roommate.. Sigh
It's a new year and I didn't even felt it.
Came back and my roommates left.
Well, "Screw them!" someone said.
I really shouldn't sweat the small stuff.
Depressing days passed and I still can't find the courage.
But if I don't do it who else would?
I need to find the driving force I've lost a while back.
Maybe I just need to put my foot outside the door.
Someone please give me a shove and a reality slap.
I'm stuck here.
I need to stop thinking.
Got to get a move on.
Came back and my roommates left.
Well, "Screw them!" someone said.
I really shouldn't sweat the small stuff.
Depressing days passed and I still can't find the courage.
But if I don't do it who else would?
I need to find the driving force I've lost a while back.
Maybe I just need to put my foot outside the door.
Someone please give me a shove and a reality slap.
I'm stuck here.
I need to stop thinking.
Got to get a move on.
Wednesday, November 3, 2010
Cat's Out Of The Bag??
Secrets. We all have them don’t we? The way I see it, there’s two kinds of them.
One is a secret about something that happened to you, or a fact about you that you don’t EVER want ANYONE to know. Maybe just a few, who’s really close to you and you can trust, knows about it.
And the other would be something of a habit. Something you do that you wouldn’t DARE do in front of another. Well, it’s because you know it’s NOT something to be proud of. :P
Okay if I’ve lost you here, maybe these examples would help. I’m talking about ‘secret’ habits like smelling your toenails, or eating your booger, or eating the food you just picked from between your teeth, or plucking your hair and sticking it on a wall.... Stuff like that. Hahaha!!!
Well if you do any of these stuffs (not saying that I’m doing it or does it anymore... *clears throat*) or anything on the same line, you know what I mean. So, what would you do if someone asks you about it? Like point it out straight to your face. What do you do?
I know, sometimes we DO get caught in the act... LOL!! But then it’s okay if your ‘catcher’ doesn’t say anything and you can just pretend that nothing happened.
But what if, just what if they ask you like “are you peeling the skin from your feet?” HAHA!!! And no, I didn’t get THAT question. So, what is the correct respond to that kind of question?
Would you say “Yes”? Then just make a ‘no big deal’ face? Or say “No” and talk about how you would NEVER do it? HAHAHA!! Or pretend you’re deaf and ignore the person?
If you’d say yes and then they start giving you advice on it, what do you do next? Say ok? Then ignore? Just smile? Or say “Mind your own business! Damn.” HAHAHA!!
Well whatever you choose to do, just don’t get caught by the same person again. *wink wink*
And to the ‘catchers’, kudos for having the courage to ask point blank but really you should mind your own business, damn...
One is a secret about something that happened to you, or a fact about you that you don’t EVER want ANYONE to know. Maybe just a few, who’s really close to you and you can trust, knows about it.
And the other would be something of a habit. Something you do that you wouldn’t DARE do in front of another. Well, it’s because you know it’s NOT something to be proud of. :P
Okay if I’ve lost you here, maybe these examples would help. I’m talking about ‘secret’ habits like smelling your toenails, or eating your booger, or eating the food you just picked from between your teeth, or plucking your hair and sticking it on a wall.... Stuff like that. Hahaha!!!
Well if you do any of these stuffs (not saying that I’m doing it or does it anymore... *clears throat*) or anything on the same line, you know what I mean. So, what would you do if someone asks you about it? Like point it out straight to your face. What do you do?
I know, sometimes we DO get caught in the act... LOL!! But then it’s okay if your ‘catcher’ doesn’t say anything and you can just pretend that nothing happened.
But what if, just what if they ask you like “are you peeling the skin from your feet?” HAHA!!! And no, I didn’t get THAT question. So, what is the correct respond to that kind of question?
Would you say “Yes”? Then just make a ‘no big deal’ face? Or say “No” and talk about how you would NEVER do it? HAHAHA!! Or pretend you’re deaf and ignore the person?
If you’d say yes and then they start giving you advice on it, what do you do next? Say ok? Then ignore? Just smile? Or say “Mind your own business! Damn.” HAHAHA!!
Well whatever you choose to do, just don’t get caught by the same person again. *wink wink*
And to the ‘catchers’, kudos for having the courage to ask point blank but really you should mind your own business, damn...
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